Anyone who has ever served in the military at any capacity understands privates. They almost certainly need their hands held to be able to differentiate their fourth point of contact and a hole in the ground. Even if you give them the simplest task and leave them alone for a few minutes. They’ll end up with a warrant for their arrest or inadvertently kill themselves through ignorance. It’s always a good rule to check all the light sockets for safety covers before we let them into the barracks. As a parent, this rhetoric might sound familiar. Well, here’s the shirt to give your child the rank they truly deserve. They don’t want to be adulted but they need an adult to survive.